The billionaire who wants another billion.
The guy who takes on eighty-hour work weeks for the mid-six-figure paycheque.
The woman who wants a nicer car despite having an excellent car already.
It seems as if we are wired as human beings to never be satisfied, always wanting more. When we finally do get what we want, the goalpost shifts as we set our sights on a loftier goal.
I’m guilty of it too. I think a certain amount of money, the perfect girlfriend, or an awesome job title is the answer to all my problems and once I get those, look out world!
However, other than a little bit of emotional/financial security, none of these things provide any long-lasting happiness or satisfaction. I just end up wanting more things.
“I’m like a dog chasing cars, I wouldn’t know what to do if I caught one, you know, I just do…things.”
-The Joker — The Dark Knight
So why exactly is it that we always think the grass is greener on the other side?
Why do we always need the newest, biggest, coolest toys to surpass the neighbours we barely even know?
Human Nature
There’s a reason humanity survived this long as a species and basically took over the world. Our biological imperative to survive, reproduce, and pass on our genes through our children is one of the reasons we always seem to want more.
Back in primitive times when we lived in small tribes, the person who acquired the most resources had a higher social status in the tribe. This led to more short-term mating and more children being born, the passing on of genes.
These extra resources also helped ensure that these children survived and pass on their genes to their own children and on and on it goes.
Social Status
Unfortunately, how others see us is a huge factor in how we derive our self-worth. In society today, because of social media influencers, materialism, and unattainable beauty standards; What we have, how much money we make, and how attractive we are have become the metrics by which a lot of the world measures success.
In the Internet age, where we have access to everything going on in the whole world at all times, we will always see people with more than us, who are more successful, more talented, and more beautiful than us.
This fuels our desire to catch up with people we perceive as “better” than us by seeking out all of these things I have mentioned above. Our society values the wrong things and we tend to want all of them.
Hedonic Consumption
The term hedonic consumption is when we purchase things that we do not need for pleasure and satisfaction. This happens once our basic needs are already fulfilled.
Essentially, you buy a new car and you love it. It looks cool, other people compliment you on it, it’s a lot of fun, and it gives you a lot of pleasure.
Eventually, after some time passes, the novelty of the new car wears off, the compliments fade, and now this has just become another car, a normal thing you have in your life and drive every day.
However, you remember how good you felt when you first bought that car. You want to feel like that again and now you’ve just seen the solution in a TV commercial for the new line of Porsche’s. Now you want this newer, better, faster car to bring back the pleasure and satisfaction you first got before.
This can happen with everything, it’s a vicious cycle and never provides long-lasting happiness or fulfillment.
So What Is The Solution To This Problem?
The solution to this problem of always wanting more is practicing gratitude. Gratitude is a positive emotion and provides long-lasting happiness and fulfillment.
Kendra Cherry, MSEd from Very Well Mind says
“Gratitude is all about recognizing the good things in your life and the role that others play in those positive events. It can have a powerful role in your health and well-being. The good news is that practicing gratitude isn’t difficult; just set aside a few minutes each day to focus on the good things that happened and what you’re thankful for.”
I personally write down ten things I am grateful for every single night before bed. It helps me focus on all the lovely things I have in my life instead of longing for things that I don’t have.
This process, repeated over time gives you a sense of fulfilment and helps you appreciate everything you have within yourself and in your life.
Recognizing and being grateful for the people, things, experiences, abilities, or talents that you already have is an amazing way to practice gratitude.
You can also express your gratitude to the people you are grateful to have in your life, this can provide happiness for more than just yourself.
In Buddhism, they say desire is the root of all suffering. Craving pleasure and material goods can never lead to happiness and it’s a craving that will never be satisfied.
I hope you can take a moment today to let go of some of the wants you have and focus on the things in your life that already provide you happiness.
Gratitude is a beautiful thing.Smash the ♥ button — If you enjoyed reading my article please like and share your thoughts
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Gratitude definitely works. Just getting older also works. Age tends to increase patience and temper the need for wandering and experimenting. It doesn't change innately greedy characters. but it does help more average folks.