Life is filled with good, bad and the ugly.
For most of my life, I searched for the good relentlessly and found a lot of bad and ugly.
So I thought I thought this newsletter talking about something good, bad, and ugly I went through this week.
The Good
I’m having fun again. It’s been a while, I think I have post-acute withdrawal symptoms which come with a whole bunch of lovely problems such as:
Foggy thinking/trouble remembering
Urges and cravings
Irritability or hostility
Sleep disturbances—insomnia or vivid dreams
Fatigue
Issues with fine motor coordination
Stress sensitivity
Anxiety or panic
Depression
Lack of initiative
Impaired ability to focus
Mood swings
Doesn’t that sound lovely?
I only put it in the ‘Good’ section because it finally seems to be going away. I’m finally getting better sleep, losing cravings, having more energy, becoming more emotionally resilient, and depression/anxiety is less severe.
So PAWS is definitely improving for me and I’m loving it.
The Bad
I AM OVERWHELMED!
In a desperate attempt to escape my feelings in early sobriety, I became a productive maniac and took on so many different tasks to stay busy.
Now that I want to actually have fun, I don’t have much time for it, so I’m going to cut some things back.
I’m going to cut out most other platforms and only focus on Substack and Medium.
I’m going to cut back on freelancing and only keep writing for one client.
I’m going to slow things down and enjoy life more.
The Ugly
The depression is still here, even though it’s less severe. I had a particularly hard time over the weekend.
Just when things are going lovely it decides to pop by and say hello, leaving me feeling useless and exhausted.
When I get like that, everything seems hopeless, the world is terrifying, and everyone hates me. Well that’s what it’s like in my brain.
The physical symptoms suck too. I can’t sleep but it hurts to be awake, it’s awful.
Fortunately, it doesn’t last very long anymore and I’m able to push through it a little.
…
So that’s just a few things I’ve dealt with since the last newsletter. It wasn’t too bad, it wasn’t too good, it was pretty okay.
I’ll take it as a win.
Some Articles I Liked From Fellow Substacker
On not drowning out the mean voices by
Author Bio: I'm an author, artist, and GenXer writing about my recovery from alcohol addiction. I like going first and changing the game. I rebel against what tries to keep me small, which is usually myself. You can understand the struggle.
I liked this piece that Allison wrote because we seem to be going on similar paths in our lives while battling addiction.
I struggle a lot with drowning out the mean voices in my head, they are not kind.
She talks about how she battles her inner critic and I found it really inspiring.
Thanks, Allison.
Mindset & Resilience: The Dynamic Duo That You Need to Fuel Your Dreams! by
I struggle with self-doubt so I really got a lot from this article.
Liana discusses the self-doubt of starting your own business. She further goes on to discuss shifting your mindset, going after your goals, and being authentic.
There is a lot of wisdom we can all get from this article!
Thanks Liana
Sobriety Prayer Of The Day by
I spend a lot of time future tripping and that’s what Bill’s short and sweet article is about.
Human beings are really bad at predicting the future but we think we’re good at it.
As bill says “Our innermost self is not clairvoyant.” So I’m going to take this bit of wisdom and stop worrying about the future so much
Thanks, Bill
The Day I Met The Love Of My Life
A 100 word story
I had been searching for a puppy for months. A random classified ad and $1000 later led to the day I picked up my puppy.
The anticipation was killing me, and time came to a halt. The workday seemed never-ending.
I ran out of the office, jumped in my car, and drove out of the city to pick her up.
She climbed to the top in a pile of six puppies as if she knew we were her people.
She crawled into my arms while driving home, crying because she was scared of cars. I soothed her.
Furever love began.
I recently discovered this video where Brandon Novak, the heroin addict, Jackass star, Viva la Bam TV regular, author, and now a sober addictions advocate.
Watch this now!
Anyone struggling with addiction or knows someone who is struggling with addiction should watch this video.
It really shows how addiction doesn’t discriminate and you can never give up.
His story is insane and extremely sad and scary and shows how low addiction can bring you.
That is my newsletter for this week gang!
It’s been another great week.
Shoutout to
and for hanging out with me on Twitch, follow me if you like video games.Have a lovely week and an even better weekend.
Much Love,
Patrick
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Thank you so much for the mention and sharing of my post. I'm so grateful that you find it helpful
The sweetest photo of your dear dog. I like the "furever love", not heard that term before.