Job Searching Is a Pain in The Ass

Why don't they grow on trees?

For as long as I can remember I’ve always loathed the job search process.

Selling yourself to a hiring manager can feel incredibly uncomfortable for somebody with low confidence and self-esteem.

Unfortunately, it’s something we all have to do in this world because there is no magic job tree where you can pluck your dream job off a branch and stay there forever.

It’s one of the reasons I’ve always settled for less in a traditional career sense. Putting myself through the job search process while I already had a job I didn’t completely hate felt like insanity. So I stayed where I was.

Then about a year ago, life happened and depression rolled in. My mental health started to deteriorate and I eventually relapsed. All of this led to me eventually going to treatment but unfortunately, there was no job for me to come back to.

I wasn’t too sad because I knew I needed a lot more time to recover.

When I first managed to get out of active addiction in June, it took me months to focus on anything besides making it through the day without drinking.

Once the cravings faded, I then realized how much more recovering I had to do so I took the time to work on myself and although there have been ups and downs, I am making a lot of progress.

So now the next step in moving past my addiction and onto living my best life is finding a job.

My life lacks routine, I’m lonely, I’m broke, and I miss having a purpose every day.

It kind of feels like I’m in some type of unemployment purgatory at the moment, where I can’t really do anything else with my life until I find a job.

So I have been doing my best and applying for jobs I think are good fit for my qualifications and the lifestyle I want to live and I’ve had some success getting interviews which I think I did really well with.

So although I think I’ve conquered my fear of selling myself in an interview, mostly because my therapist is helping me see how cool I am and how I would be an asset to any organization, I’m still left with the worst part.

The waiting game…

These days, you are lucky if you get a considerate email saying the company has chosen someone else. Most of the time, you just don’t hear anything and are left wondering.

For an impatient person like myself, the waiting game is a cruel sort of torture.

I have zero patience and I fear uncertainty like crazy so you can see why job searching stresses me out so much.

So, I’m choosing to leave it all up to faith—faith in the universe, faith in myself, faith in whatever.

I’m choosing to believe that if I put in the work, apply for jobs, prepare for the interviews, and try to make a good first impression, then everything will work out and I’ll find the job right for me.

So this control freak is practicing some letting go for once.

If you’ve been through a stressful job search experience how did you get through it?

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